Saturday, August 11, 2012

The Influence of Seventh Day Adventists

Before the camera was wrestled
from me, at Shrigley exhibit
I think that taking melatonin and valerian at night make me feel depressed during the day. It is very hard to isolate factors with depression...I haven't taken anything for a few days, and the depression, which I felt strongly in my body, is gone. And I have felt more awake during the day. I've also been walking for an hour a day...Anyway the last few nights I've done without them. I may try to take them only during the first seven days after chemo.

There are at least two different approaches to illness and discomfort. One involves taking all the recommended drugs for each emerging symptom. I feel that diet, acupuncture, and exercise, are the primary reason that I have not been devastated by the chemotherapy (yet.) Of course I can't be certain of that either. My diet is not very strict these days...I try to eat a lot of veg and no sugar. Yesterday I had very spicy Thai food (tofu and veg) and it seemed all right. Helen and Justin have made me a few meals, and Noelle, too.

My approach to pharmaceutical drug-taking is perhaps related to the fact that my mom grew up as a Seventh Day Adventist. She certainly resists prescription drugs. (For example, after 15 years of depression, which my sisters and I have found incredibly frustrating.) She says will work it out herself. This is exactly what I say. Of course when I say I will work it out...I actually do. Yes?

I like the fog coming in behind the school,
and the quality of the light
I think maybe some people conceive of drugs as solving problems. I think of them as potentially solving problems, and causing other problems. Chip off the old block. I think this saves me a lot of trouble (but maybe causes more, who knows.)

Yesterday: Pilates class so fab. They had a party for August birthdays so I was crowned, etc. It was really fun. Also picked up my barium which I drink in advance of my scan this week. Went with Amy to see David Shrigley's exhibit at the Yerba Buena. It was great.

I really ought not to think of myself as toxic. While I am being shot up with heavy metals among other things every three weeks, the toxins also weaken over the three weeks. And my body is 99.99% functional.

Had an excellent chat with the excellent Mike Osgood this morning, about tension in the heart, meditation, and sex.

Karunadevi's moving in soon, possibly tomorrow!

I am in fact taking up Lafayette's scarf aesthetic (from the HBO show True Blood), at least when I am at home.

Going up with Sebastopol with Tong today to this brother's house for Tong's birthday. Gotta go.

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