Sunday, September 23, 2012

Grease head

Constipation, insomnia, depression?
All right. I have identified that my trouble is not coming from the shots I am giving myself. It's the Trazodone that was making me more lethargic, in my guts and in the rest of my body, and depressed EVERY DAY. I wish I had gotten Ambien. At this point, I don't care about the potential addiction, and with other drugs I have taken, it is not an issue. Traz is crap. I didn't take it last night and already, today, I feel so much better. Constipation is a potential side effect of BOTH Trazodone and Neupogen (the shots.) That's gotten a lot better, too. Today I did develop a reddish bump on my forearm above my wrist. Folks thought it was probably a spider bite. I'm going to take some Benedryl tonight, see if that helps.

I used to have oily hair. Now I have an oily head. Makes sense, doesn't it? My head has a kind of muskiness that transfers to my head covers unless I take precautions. I seem to favor one-step head covers for around-the-house needs these days, like the one that Nora sent me (pictured below) from Hawaii, and a few buffs that Dhammagita sent. I'm using the pretty scarves, too, but mostly not wrapping them around my head.

Hippie acupuncture
I don't even look like this.
My face is still a bit numb, that hasn't changed. Someone in the support group yesterday said she had had that too.

Listened to a bit of Malcolm Gladwell's What the Dog Saw tonight. Fascinating, especially the part about Cesar Millan, analyzing how he moves...

Movie night on Bartlett St.: Watched a bit of Koyaanisqatsi. And Quadrophenia including important Q&A with Padmatara. (So was it a clothing issue between the Mods and the Rockers? Is that Sting? What's Beachy Head?) It was astonishing how often the men call each other cunts. I suppose the equivalent here is calling someone a pussy. But it seems so much worse.

Friend from Britain clarifies:
Pussy is saying someone is a wimp or cowardly or feeble (basically a man who’s seen as behaving like a woman in some negative way). Cunt is much worse (partly as it’s always been such a taboo word) – it’s someone who’s a complete bastard, or totally stupid, or really thoughtless or selfish, etc, or simply someone you hate - more the equivalent of asshole for you, but actually I think it's more weighty than asshole. Of course as always it depends on who’s saying it to whom. It’s so long since I saw Quadrophenia I can't remember it – but often it’s used as a sort of friendly banter way (like any other insulting word can be).
You may also be interested to know that calling someone a ‘berk’, while it sounds much less insulting (and indeed is generally intended as much less insulting) actyally means cunt, as it comes from rhyming slang – Berkely Hunt/cunt.
So my summary is, a super harsh yet almost friendly way for a British male to refer to a male friend, using a very bad word for vagina.


  1. Beachy Head. Gorgeus chalk cliffs near Eastbourne, where my friend Kirsty is from. Next to the Seven Sisters, which are seven kind cliffs that jut out in a row. In the south downs. Not too far from Brighton. You should go see them. Gorgeous!

  2. Yikes, sorry about the trazadone. Lethargy goes in time, don't remember bowels, but def dreams. Next stop: benzos. If you're asking.

    I don't think we have a word with the same multi directional valence as cunt. Though we do have mdv words, they're aren't in the same configuration. Asshole is rarely as friendly.