Saturday, June 30, 2012

Uncomfortably Numb

Lily's butterfly
photo by Paris Cullen
While horking down popcorn yesterday watching a movie with Cull about male strippers, my feet and hands started to go numb - also known as neuropathy - a side effect of the chemotherapy I was warned about. I think I remember that all they can do about it is reduce your dosage next time, or change drugs. If it gets too bad or goes unchecked, the nerve damage can be permanent. All I'm supposed to do about it is let my doctor know, but these kinds of things seem to happen only on weekends...

And I started feeling weird, something but not quite like my body being wired up and weirdly drunk at the same time. With random pains coming and going, and chills. My temperature was a little high. For a few moments I thought: Oh my god, I cannot take this for five months! Then that thought kind of merged into now, which can only be itself.

Figs and peaches from
the bartlett st. farmer's market
After lying down for a while, and 600 mg of ibuprofen, and beef wonton soup, the elixir of the gods, I felt fine. I might try marijuana at some point and see if it helps anything.

Cull made some chard from one of my new cancer treatment oriented cookbooks by Rebecca Katz today, very good. I will start eating less fruit. It's so awesomely tasty right now but it's pretty much a laxative, and has a lot of sugar. I've been walking every other day, and not doing very much yoga, alas. Also I looked at the chemo sheet nurse David gave me and found sun sensitivity, unlike what nurse Agnes told me on the phone the other day. You know how when you ask someone a question, and you can tell they don't know, but that they're going to answer anyway? So, sunscreen. 

...Good god endlessly talking about food and my health, etc., is so boring. But I carry on, it's all I got. 

How am I? I can't answer that question in a general way. I feel great when I wake up. Before I lay my head down again, a kind of fog will slowly settle in, and my body will do weird things which will then change.

Capped off the night watching some Louis C.K. which was great.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry about the neuropathy it sounds scary. I do like the word "horking" as in "horking down popcorn"--also Louie CK can cure anything. xox