I caught a glimpse of the lung x-rays but did not manage to take a photo. They revealed that mets in my upper left lung lobe have caused it to collapse. Which is distressing but at least explains the shortness of breath and weariness. Apparently people can live with just one lung. At this point I have one and a half.
The brain MRI was checking for 'disease progression' only, since an accurate scan can only happen 2-3 months after radiation. Some of the smaller mets are gone and the largest one has shrunk, but there is some swelling around it. She suggested taking a low dose of steroids to help with appetite and energy (and swelling) and see how it goes.
Cyberknife could be an option - it's a super focused kind of radiation treatment - for the brain and/or lungs. She's going to talk to Dr. Patel about options.
I told her I would not do chemo unless I start feeling a lot better than I do now. She said she'd put me on hospice but since I'm going to be away anyway she'd wait 'til I get back. If I do decide to do chemo she'd take me off hospice (apparently one can start and stop it like that.)
My next appointment with her is July 8. I'll leave the retreat July 6, if not earlier. I imagine that it will be my last retreat.
It was a sobering visit, which probably hasn't totally sunk in.
It was a sobering visit, which probably hasn't totally sunk in.
Can You Find It? Circa 1987 painting of Ronald Reagan, Laura with laptop, gold kesa, shrine, walking brain sent by Dhammagita |
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ReplyDeleteLOVE the gold kesa! And the walking brain. And Laura. Shrine looks so clean and pretty, someone did a really nice job with that, ha, ha! Not at all happy about the lung collapse, no more than you though I'm sure. Glad to hear brain mets have shrunk. I hope you start feeling stronger! I love you to bits. Jules
ReplyDeleteSadhu on your ceremony. May you have the best retreat of your life -- so far! Much metta, Lynne
ReplyDeletelovely to see the image of you wearing the gold kesa and pleased your energy held out for the ceremony. I hope my card arrived in time by post. I shall be thinking of you on retreat, may it be a peaceful and happy time for you amidst the tiredness. Much love as always, Sanghadevi
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